New York, New York

In Manhattan I saw a scene that was so classic I still think it could have been street theatre. On a street near Central Park there was a hot dog vendor in the old style, a two wheeled stainless-steel pushcart, he had pretzels, he had sauerkraut, onions, great polish dogs plumping up on a rolling cooker. A guy dressed in a business suit with a red power necktie strides by and turns on his heel.

"Wow! Man, that takes me back! Just like when I was a kid, my Dad would bring me here and buy a big old old-fashioned hot dog from a stand exactly like this one. And you, sir, I'm genuinely touched that you're carrying on this great tradition. That's wonderful! Thanks!"

The hot dog vendor is clearly pleased. "Well, gosh, thanks, mister, that means a lot to me. What'll it be, buddy?"

"Let's see, I'll have a Polish, loaded. Do you have that Heileman's mustard? Oh, perfect. Lots of onions, please." The man unclips his tie and turns it carefully over his shoulder. "Ahh, geez, that even smells the same as I remembered!"

He takes a big bite of the hot dog, mustard and sauerkraut spraying from its far end. "Ha ha, ready for you, you tricky little son-of-a-gun. Oh, this is fabulous, thanks!"

It looks and smells so good the hot dog guy wants one himself. "You're very welcome, sir. That'll be $5.75."

"Five...Dollars...and...seventy-five...cents? You've gotta be kidding me! What is this?! Some kind of con? No, seriously. I thought maybe a buck, a buck twenty-five. There's no way I'm paying that kind of money for a crummy hot-dog!"

"Pay up, you tightwad."

"Oh, so now we're getting personal are we, you ethnic bastard? What gives you the unmitigated gall to stand there and try to charge me a fucking fortune for a fucking two-bit hot-dog? I oughta ..."

"You ate the god-damned thing, didn't you? Pay up! You want a pretzel too? That's another $3.75, you fucking jerk!"

"Don't call ME a jerk, you twisted little piece of shit. That's it." The man in the suit flings the paper tray with the hot dog to the ground and dives at the smaller man, grabbing him clumsily around the shoulders and then pushing him roughly to the pavement.

"You stupid cocksucker. Get the hell away from me. I'll sue your ass!"

As though returning from a land of distant rage, the customer gives his discarded hot dog a final mushy kick, pulls out a fat black wallet and throws a five dollar bill fluttering at the vendor's feet.

"Fuck you, buddy. Go stomp on someone else's memories! I paid you man, I paid MORE than it was worth..." And scuttles guiltily away as the hot dog vendor climbs wearily to his feet, brushes the dust from his clothes and prepares himself for his next customer.
.